I have been asked why I fell so hard and fast for Tom. Aside from his handsome facade, beautiful blue eyes, salt and pepper (mostly salt :)) hair, and strong body, there is so much more to this man than meets the eye. Not to detract from his agreeable physical characteristics (of which there are many in my view), but the man I fell in love with is so much more....
...When I talk, he listens. He wants to know my opinions, my thoughts, my feelings. He doesn't mind when I get all "rilled up" about this or that. He makes me feel like I am not that crazy for getting too involved in a work problem or the latest political debate. What's more, he responds. He shares his view and actively participates in helping me solve the latest problem. He is a true partner. Which, in my view, is what man should be.
...He makes me feel special. I can't remember one single day when he failed to tell me that he thinks I am beautiful. He leaves me sweet little notes and sends me emails during the work day. The one I got yesterday said simply "Did you know that you still take my breath away?" My lazy ass was still in bed when he sent this sweet message (he works first shift). But rest assured, it absolutely made my day when I finally woke up and read it. It may seem shallow to some, but this type of thing is important to me. I know what it's like to feel, well, invisible. His daily expression of admiration for me is stunningly sexy.
...He helps around the house. Or, should I say he does most of the house work? It's kind of a toss up. I swear this is true: I have not done laundry since the man moved in. This of course is no problem for me. I hate laundry. Daily, I come home from work to find him vacuuming, straightening, and cleaning the house. I swear it's the military in him. Whatever it is, I'm good with it. And, not that I don't clean. But I certainly can't represent that I do most of the work. We share it. And I love that about him.
...He supports me no matter what. I could come up with the most outrageous, outlandish, absurd dream out there and he would be game. I could say "I want to move to Australia to raise kangaroos" and he would start looking for property. That is just how he is. Last year, I left the house one morning for work and came home two hours later unemployed. I quit my job. Just like that. Without another job. Without another plan. When I told him, he said, "I knew you were going to quit anyways. Who cares? What do you want to do? We will make it happen." Never mind that we had lost half our income in a down economy. If I thought that was what I needed to do, then so be it. He was in. This kind of loyalty is seldom found and should be treasured.
...He lets me feel, he lets me express, and he comforts me after. Believe it or not, I am not that open of a person. I have traditionally had problems expressing my feelings. My opinions, no, my feelings, yes. Something about Tom makes me feel safe enough to do this. This has been especially important when facing my reproductive challenges. I used to be so hesitant to even acknowledge, much less discuss, my infertility. It's like Tom is my safe space.
Here's hoping he is the father of my children
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