We are back from our 10-day long siesta. My God, I love vacation. I think I was actually meant to be born in the lap of luxury. There must have been a big mix-up in the reincarnation line circa January 1979. Because of it, there is some Paris Hilton-like debutante running around living my fabulous carefree life. And I'm living her nine-to-five existence. Ugh.
Anyway, I have a little case of the back-from-vacation blues... This morning when the alarm went off, I found myself saying, "Really!" and cursing the thing. But, alas, there are bills to pay. So, I begrudingly got up and got to work.
This weekend I am looking forward to celebrating my birthday and my engagement with some good friends. Tomorrow night, Tom & I are off to Ashton & Kyle's house for a little celebration. VIP expected:: Allison & Scott and Lori & Allen. Just the thing to get rid of these post-vacation blues.
So, on to Project Baby. First, I had a mini-meltdown in Florida over (of all things) ANTIBIOTICS! Seriously, I cried for 30 minutes because Tom & my sister kept insisting that I call my doctor and get a prescription for antibiotics. I don't know what, but something in South Florida makes my allergies go NUTS. Everytime I go visit my sister I get a horrible allergy attack, which inevetibly turns into a sinus infection. On Monday, I was so sick that Tom & Laura decided I needed medication and that I couldn't fight it on my own. Well, while they were discussing who to call to the prescription, etc, all I could think was "Ohhhhh noooooo. Not Antibiotics. I have been taking three birth control pills a day, pumping hormones through my body at an alarming rate, so that I could stop bleeding. I'm finally stopped and ready for the other tests and now I'm going to take Antibiotics? Everyone knows antibiotics interfere with the birth control pill. Taking this thing will make me start bleeding again!!!!" I know it sounds trivial to others, but the prospect of bleeding AGAIN prior to when it has been scheduled /planned puts me in grave risk having a panic attack. For 10 years, I dealt with bleeding off schedule, on schedule, throw out the schedule it's useless anyway, and finally bleeding for the rest of enternity. So, the issue is very important to me.
Does anyone else going through this do these types of things? Freak out over the least little thing and have people (who don't have fertility issues) look at you like you are crazy? Well, that's what it was like. Laura & Tom were like, "It's just an antibiotic. Listen to you, you need it." And I'm screaming crying saying, "I DON'T WANT TO TAKE THE DAMN THING. IT WILL MAKE ME BLEED. IT WILL THROW US OFF OUR PLAN. I'MMMMM NOOOT TAKING IT! I ran to Laura's guest bedroom and draped myself over the bed (Scarlett O'Hara style) and threw my head into the pillow to cry. And I laid there and cried. Real tears. Until Tom came in. He is so good with me. He is so good at bringing me back to reality using words that speak to me. He logically explains that they just wanted me well, that the nature of my sickness is going to require medication to get me well, and that none of the fertility treatments will be worth anything if I'm too sick. So, altough Project Baby is Number One Priority, sometimes other projects come up which MUST be taken care of to protect Project Baby. In Short - I have to get myself well to have any chance of conceiving. I have to be healthy. As usual, he brought me out of my own misery using logical arguments big-picture talk. He knows me so well. I got off that bed, apologized to my sister & Tom, and called the doctor. I started antibiotics that night.
In addition to the antibiotics, I began my 7 day regiment on MedroxyProgesteronne, Generic for Provera today. In women who are not pregnant and not going through menopause, this medication is used to treat abnormal bleeding from the uterus and to restore normal menstrual periods in women who have stopped having them for several months (amenorrhea). I am to take these along with my birthcontrol pill for seven days. After that I am to stop taking either. At this time, I should begin to bleed. Heavily. Really Heavily. Once that bleeding starts to wane I will begin the birthcontrol again & we will do the same thing next month. I'm totally excited about this hemmoraging thing that will be happening soon. (sarcassm)
Aside from these issues, we have to figure out how to pay for the treatments. My crappy insurance doesn't pay. It will be around $1500 per insemination. That is alot. More than our house payment. So, let's hope Sainty Claus has a barren niece and decides to pay for the insemination this year. I've been good! Well, mostly good...
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